I ate lunch at JW's. In the middle of my wrap, I mentioned, "It's been a year today since [the boy] first contacted me." Without looking up from studying, he said, "Let it gooooooo..." I almost fell out of my chair laughing. He was right, of course. I was going to blog about it, make a big deal about it, recount our 9 months of [insert word for relationship/friendship], but you know, a year later is just a good time as any to let it go...
They say you never forget your first love. I probably won't. I might not even get over him. But it's ok. I'm learning to laugh at myself, to stop being a melodramatic softie, and to move on.
The sun has finally broken thru the clouds today (literally, not poetically) and I'm trying to soak up some much needed vitamin D. Damn exams.
3 comments:
You never forget your first love...I know, I've tried. But you love again..and again and the memory is not so present....
Love your blog!
While you may never forget your first love you may forget you ever loved that person. I have found as I've gotten older the concept of romantic love becomes better defined and as it does less tangible and far less attainable. You begin to see people for what they are and realize the notion of romantic love is actually unrealistic and eventually you learn it just isn't a real thing. Its a phantom people chase their whole lives only to wind up settling for or alone in the end when they still can't accept there is no such thing.
Thanks for the comments, boys!
Toy! I replied on your blog, buddy. ;)
Cog-Asc! (Hey that's kinda catchy.) Hey, you could have at least put some kind of "spoiler warning" on that! Dammit, now I know the ending...
Actually, no, I find that as I age I realize I had no IDEA what the full implications of "love" were, what kind of heart, courage, and commitment it took, and how amazing it could be. I had an inkling, but I was wrong. It is better than I ever thought it was, and harder. Yes, I loved the Boy. Yes, it was awesome. No, it wasn't all it could be. But he was still my first love, and will always hold that place in my heart.
Just wait a few months, little tadpole, hopefully you'll outgrow your jaded cynicism when you're as old as I am. (Happy birthday, a little late, by the way.)
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